CEREBROSPINALECTOMYThings every one of us has done and never once admitted. Be honest — which number are you? (If you say none, you're number 2.) Front desk: "Just one quick add-on." Me: "What is the complaint?" Front desk: "Dizziness." Me: "That is not a quick add-on." Me: "That is a career." Dizziness. One word. Forty minutes minimum, and that is if it goes well. Ortho: "pt confused." Surgery: "pt confused." Psych: "pt confused." I am not a neurologist. I am the confusion department. Hour nineteen. I walked into the workroom and introduced myself to my own resident. He shook my hand. He also wasn't sure. Colleague: "I'll take your Labor Day if you take my Thanksgiving." Me: "That's not a trade." Me: "That's a mortgage." Holiday coverage is the only currency in medicine that appreciates against you. You always pay back a three-day weekend with a four-day one, at interest, in December.
EXPLAINED (ACCURACY-CHECKED)
(1) No clinical claim. Reflects the well-known clinical reality that 'dizziness' is a nonspecific chief complaint spanning vestibular, cardiovascular, neurologic and other causes, and requires a lengthy history and exam to characterize. No diagnosis or advice offered. (2) No medical claim — observational humor about altered mental status being reflexively referred to neurology regardless of cause. (3) No medical claim — self-directed humor about cognitive effects of extended wakefulness on clinicians. Punches at the doctors and the schedule, never at a patient. (4) No medical claim - clinician-life culture satire about holiday call coverage.
PERMANENT LINK
https://cerebrospinalectomy.com/jokes/front-desk-just-one-quick-add-on/
https://cerebrospinalectomy.com/jokes/front-desk-just-one-quick-add-on/
Reprint anywhere, non-commercially, with attribution to cerebrospinalectomy.com. We punch at specialties, the system, and ourselves — never at patients.